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Torq
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Ah yes the gates of heaven is right. They angels though, they do demand a toll.
A small toll to be sure but they will ask for the sun and the moon and the stars. The truth of the matter though is that YOU get to determine how large or small the toll will be. My little brown wife said exactly the same thing: "In Merika everyone work, you no work you no eat."
My wife's story is similar to that of literally thousands of the allegedly “Not good girls”, but in fact what 99% of these girls want to just get married. For them these little bars are nothing more than speed dating. Despite what many people may be critical of I think they can make pretty good wives. Think of them as a fine sports car. With care and loving attention there just isn't a better ride. They are beautifully built and perfectly tuned. They are special purpose built machines. Remember while there is no better driving experience than taking a red Ferrari down a twisting mountain highway on a sunny day...you simply can't haul freight with it at the same time. Conversely if you take care of it your Ferrari will always be sleek and elegant, while your '78 Volvo Wagon will always be just that: a drag ass shitty looking '78 Volvo wagon...
I once asked my wife; "What did you think we all did over here before you came?" Did you think we were all very rich and just playing around?"
Her answer was delivered with a beautiful Thai smile: "Yes honey."
"What do you think now honey?" I asked.
"I tell my Mom and Dad honey. I tell how hard everyone work here. They understand better now, not like every family, they understand now."
You can pay or not pay whatever you want for a dowry. I paid them 200K Baht and had a very large wedding and it cost accordingly. I thought giving them gold was excessive so I didn't do it. You can do whatever you want here. I did my best to be fair and kind. I got some pressure for the gold but that went away as I respectfully said "ain't gonna happen." I didn't just deliver this as a dead no. I carefully tried to explain that while I was a working professional; I AM NOT RICH. Once she got to America I knew I'd have to support her and her family, so the village "squander fest" was just in my power to support.
My wife doesn't work here but we do have a baby together. It took a long time to get a work permit for her (she pressed for one too) but...Things in the States really don't make much sense for her to work outside of the house. She can't really make much and there is a lot of risk in my mind as well until the Thais come up to speed. Now with the baby after taxes there is really no way whatever tiny sum she could earn will make it very positive from an income standpoint. I would strongly encourage you to filter her friends and associates. In California at least there is good Asian culture and low Asian culture. Be very very careful...I've lived and worked abroad and so I applied this to making my wife's transition as comfortable and positive as I can. I have carefully and quitely discouraged any association with any barracudas from the "Old Country". We have plenty of Thai friends here but we're careful to pick quality over quantity. It doesn't matter their former profession so much as their current one in States...
We've been together about 5 years and it has been a perfect marriage in my opinion. I’ve done my best to be a good and loving husband and I feel rewarded for that every day of my life with her. She is super easy to do things with and is a good spirited positive and happy little woman. It is and continues to be a great marriage. Occasionally there is some sort of shenanigan coming out of the village where I’m supposed to pay for something and each time I just weigh the story out and decide accordingly. My wife has full visibility into our finances and things here so she can see what we can do and what we can’t. This takes time and investment on your part to teach her and it will not be a quick learn for your girl generally. The important thing is for her to see you over time being consistent and not appearing capricious with funds regarding her family. It takes time to bridge the Thai and Western cultures in a marriage, just proceed with her slowly avoid fighting and be consistent.
Good luck!
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 1:02 pm on April 1, 2009
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CalEden
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I am still mad about the 3 legged water buffalo!
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 2:21 pm on April 1, 2009
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atl
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Cal, thats funny man 
Thailife wrote:
"This is just the start of the gradual shifting of the money in your wallet to the family."
after re-reading my post on the last page I wanted to clarify a point...the main purpose of me building the house in a few years is so that it will serve as "homebase" in Thailand when I decide to retire and also for my wife when she goes on her annual visits.......
I want to build it in my late 30's/early 40's so that it is paid for over a period of time and doesnt come all at once when I retire....and when I do decide to retire in my lates 50's or early 60's I have my spot there and my place in the States......
but I envision most of mine and mrs atl's time will be spent in LOS with frequent trips (by me) to Bangkok and whatever beach I dig the most in my golden years.....
That is my plan......but the in-laws are welcome to live in it until then and even in the future when I retire...just stay out of the room I dedicate as my lair of enjoyment and solitude 
Cheers,
atl
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 3:40 pm on April 1, 2009
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Torq
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Oh yes...
I don't feel one tinsy bit guilty about what I send or don't send to LOS. The village was the village before I showed up and it will be largely the same after I'm gone. I've helped her older brother and isster a bit, but then they both work as hard as I do and have tiny garment piece work businesses.
Her younger brother is an idiot and stole most of the afore mentioned "dowry" 6 months after her mom and dad got it. Not even that was enough to drown the squeals from the village for cash to help the worthless idiot. It was only after I turned his channel to ignore that the pain stopped.
He'd had a severe motor bike accident, compound fracture internal injuries the whole bit. Of course it wasn't his fault...at all...poor innocent lad....the Thai driver that plowed into him and his idiot friend was blind drunk (too?) and unfortunetly for him had auto insurance (unbelievable but true). The way this all worked out was as predictable as it was instructive. The guy that hit them had auto insurance so he had to pay for the hospital, doctors, rehab etc. It required that "dad" navigate the insurance process with the boys in brown and the hospital. This was something dad clearly was a little intimidated by at 1st.
Anyhoo the way dad (in a walking delusion) wanted this to work out was for me to PAY the medical bills 1st (several thousand US dollars) and then I was to be paid back after the inurance settled....uh let's see...no...
I carefully and quietly explained that I'd had over a year of monthly near death drama laden cash calls for this non-working, yard bird. If "dad" wanted to fund junior's Playboy lifestyle out of his own pocket; then be my guest. Quai Noi here (me) though was done...stick a fork in me.
Guess what?it's been years and junior who previously seemed to drive around like a dope smoking fuel air bomb has calmed it down to the extent that I ask every couple of months if he's still alive. Those of you that have experienced this know how gooooooooood it feels to have to be the one inquiring to the health of a previously sick "buffalo"...it's almost orgasmic. 
My wife was really good about this too as once she was over here; she could no tbe put in the middle of the drama. Mom and Dad have in fairness been a joy overall. Bottom line, do what you are comfortable with but just don't let Thai rice farmer village idiots tell you how to spend your money. No need to be cruel, just fair open and firm. It's not like local Thai upper class folks drive around throwing cash to villagers....and the villagers are well aware of this too.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 3:54 pm on April 1, 2009
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james bond
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Holy shit i'm getting flash backs from reading all of this, that f*** my Wedding and Dowry are long behind me, also my wallet.
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 7:26 pm on April 1, 2009
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expatchuck
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Quote: from CalEden on 2:21 am on April 2, 2009
I am still mad about the 3 legged water buffalo!
Did you sell it to buy those pajamas?
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Bangkok Women : Meet Beautiful Thai Girls
Posted on: 9:20 pm on April 1, 2009
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CalEden
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No I bought those pajamas to humour her, I have to beg for sex. Wonder if thailife's wife has a sister?
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 10:36 pm on April 1, 2009
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atl
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I will preface that this post is not on topic, but I thought about it after his posts......
I love TL's posts....and this is way off topic and sorry BK for thread f***ing...
But, something tells me that Thailife has a sex life that is beyond all us mortals....I mean having sex while my is my wife sucking anothers girls tits is one thing (that happened when we dated)..
But f***ing her whilst she sucks another man's cock (which is what I think I remember TL posted before) is just out of the question in my mind..
But, I did go to a club with an old GF called Calligula in ATL and couples were 50 bucks and if you were alone it was 100 bucks..
and f***ed my (then GF) in front of many other people and people were walking around with drinks giving me high fives and shit...but it is different with a wife...in my mind at least...
My props to our man TL 
cheers,
atl
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 10:55 pm on April 1, 2009
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ringthebells
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somebody I know got 1 mio baht "sin sot" plus a house for the parents.
rtb
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 12:16 am on April 2, 2009
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romeland
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That is my plan......but the in-laws are welcome to live in it until then and even in the future when I retire...just stay out of the room I dedicate as my lair of enjoyment and solitude.....
My plan too - except I suspect that the in laws, the brothers, the sisters, the uncles, the aunties, the pet dogs, the children with no mum or dad because parents die in road accident, the pet cats, curious old woman with black teeth and half of f***ing Issan live in the house when I am not there. Whenever I come back I suspect a mass clean up operation, especially when they all look at me with their griining faces. Oh here comes Mr. Meal Ticket - Heineken for the whole village - when I leave they drink Leo - f***ing scrounging parasites most of them - they must think I am f***ing stupid - well perhaps I am !!
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 2:57 am on April 2, 2009
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