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chilli
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Guys,
Given the different traditions, laws etc. between east & west regarding beatings especially among couples I was wondering if anyone else have heard that TGs prefer a beating to cheating with the logic that physical scars heal fully over relatively short time (usually) while emotional scars may never heal?
Took me by surprise when I heard that preference as previously when hearing accounts of girls beeing beaten up I did notice though that it was often told in a matter of fact wqay more than in a sad way.
E.g. TG saying: "you know my friend just got beaten up again last night by her bf/husband did u notice the scars?"
Me: "Oh thats sad poor her but they look so happy together!!"
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 10:13 pm on May 26, 2007
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seajohn
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I don't think that enraged violence will satisfy a man's sexual urge. It is perversion of the energy if anything and will do nothing more than frustrate it and absess it like a nasty pimple. That is the path of dangerous forms of self-repression.
I don't think Thai girls, or any girls, would like either a beating or their man cheating. You can speculate on which one a desperate brainwashed person might prefer; we all could speculate. However I don't think the two subjects are related naturally in any way, nor should they be.
Why have you related them? May I ask, is this pattern of thought something that you heard from one girl or from many?
Personally I think it's a self-hating form of illogic no matter where it came from, that does nothing more than continue a situation of emotional and physical slavery. If Thai women are saying this, then I would say Wow how effective the brainwashing still is; and how imbecillic are the brainwashers still... However, as we now have the theory of 'two consenting adults' (if most people in this world can possibly be categorized that way) we must accept that they must be able to do what they want, no matter what it looks like to little old me... I know that some sad and horrible shit happens between people, both strangers and beloved ones, both armed and unarmed, in this world and I can't justify half of what I or anybody else does, and much of it is hard to accept no matter how you look at it.
But I will say that, although no one has ever given me a degree in psychology, but if some guy was sitting here right in front of us and saying "Man I'm so horny with all these hot chicks walking around I wanna get some strange, but hell I love my wife too much so I'd better go home and work it off beating her with my hands and fists," I'd tell that motherf***er to go get his head examined immediately after he goes and gets his marriage divorce finalized... And I'd try to put this in a nice way that won't look like I'm interfering with another gorilla's 'property' see?
So... I apologize for the delay, but to finally answer your question, BTF member chilli, now that I have become so heavy with my own words that I have crashed through my flimsy soapbox... No I have not heard about this masochistic preference from anyone, though I would say that it must in someway be true since the phenomena continue. However, I would also point out that the Thai males are in such a position that they can self indulge themselves both with beating their wives and cheating on them, as they like.
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EDIT IN: Oops forgot to mention that I initally thought the subject of this thread was going to be Is it better to beat off than cheat...? In which case I'd answer, not in the long run.
Good luck.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 11:33 pm on May 26, 2007
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Frank La Rue
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A nasty ropic, but refreshing that someone tosses in a new area for discussion.
As stated by Seajohn, neither am I a psychologist but have lived long enough to know that
1) There are people out there with a psyche within which there is a connection between sexual desires/fulfillment and violence.
I think there is proffesional knowledge in this area about why some people have this link established in their minds.
2) There are people who suffer from the Stockholm Syndrome, i.e, you are or get attached to your abuser. The battered self esteem from the abuse makes a person feel that staying with the abuser is emlotionally "safer" then being on her/his own. There is abuse occationally, but it is seen as a part of an overall predictable releationship, within which also "affection" is displayed.
I shall abstain from speculating whether S & M is a role - play form of real abuse.
I know of personal stories where the abuser actually is the woman practicing physical abuse on the man (for instance burning with cigarette but), whereas the man is a totally non-violent person, can't comprehend that it IS abuse, is so stuck in his perception that he lives in a relationship that is supposed to be loving by nature, so he asks himself what he is guilty of, for her to do him harm.
Too much analyzing of psychological cause and effect, in stead of saying abuse is the responsability of the abuser and there is zero tollerance. It went on for a long time before the guy actually woke up.
I also know of a case where the guy is a normal, emotionally healthy person, but his female partner begged him to hit her during sexual intercouse, far harder than he was able to make himself do, as it crossed the borderline for what constitutes physical pain and physical harm
Interestingly, I have never had anyone confess to me that she lives wit han abuser or a guy confessing that he is one, allthough statistically we must all have met some. It indicates to me that the abusers, who are out there, know it is considered unacceptabel behaviour in our culture, which brings us to the question of the topica starter - is it accepted in Thai culture?
I have never heard about the beating versus cheating in Thai culture, but it would be interesting to know if others have an experience similar to the topic starter.
The overriding point to make is: GET OUT of the relationship. Analyzing it does not change the abusive behaviour.
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 12:58 am on May 27, 2007
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DaffyDuck
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Interesting subject, with one simple conclusion - there is absolutely no reason, and no excuse for a man to beat or physically abuse a woman.
Regardless of how some women have rationalized it (western women are no different in that regard), there are sadly plenty of guys with inferiority complexes, who feel that the only way they can compensate for their lack of masculinity is by using violence - or, more simply said "violence is the last recourse of the incompetent".
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 1:44 am on May 27, 2007
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BigDUSA
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Quote: from DaffyDuck on 3:29 am on May 28, 2007
Interesting subject, with one simple conclusion - there is absolutely no reason, and no excuse for a man to beat or physically abuse a woman.
Some women enjoy 'rough trade' during sex. Mild application of pain and degradation tends to intensify her orgasm. This is between consenting adults.
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 1:52 am on May 27, 2007
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seajohn
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Quote: from Frank La Rue on 2:43 pm on May 27, 2007
1) There are people out there with a psyche within which there is a connection between sexual desires/fulfillment and violence.
I think there is proffesional knowledge in this area about why some people have this link established in their minds.
Yes I have read a study that indicated that scenes or thoughts of violence or conquering can be arrousing for a male (I'm sorry I have no link to it here), however I would simply conclude that anything physically exciting to the human body, such as danger or violence or sex or fear or creativity or joy can be used to channel the energy produced into one of those categories. Like the effects of any stimulant.
However the games that BDUSA mentions above in order to produce such a stimulant should not be related, I would hope, to the men who try to make their penises bigger by beating up their wives and keeping them in a state of subjegation, such as DDuck and FLRue point out.
But these, again, reflect my layman's knowledge...
Yes, I will repeat, as done above, there is no need to stay in an abusive relationship. It is a self limiting self delusion.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Beautiful Thai Girls
Posted on: 2:11 am on May 27, 2007
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Frank La Rue
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Agreed, I don't think we are talking about BigDusa's form here. I think that is acknowledged as a practice by some, consenting adults. I think we are talking about far worse and very violent behaviour.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 2:26 am on May 27, 2007
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Mel Gibson
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The daff, that is ducky quickly jumps in with a daft reply. He never even looks at what was written by Frank La Rue. Fank went to same pains to explain that abuse happens not only from males to females but also from females to males.
The correct thing to say Mc Duck is,no-one,no person has any right to hurt any other person,, male or female.
There may be well be an "out" for consenting adults enjoying heavy S&M, but that is a seperate thing.
Mel
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 3:50 am on May 27, 2007
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ringthebells
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call me spanky, not cornuto...
rtb
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 4:38 am on May 27, 2007
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Sarge
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This is a thorny subject; domestic violence (battery) is a sensitive issue, something that occurs worldwide and not just Thailand. I find particularly abhorrent when one physically / mentally abuse someone weaker (be it a man or woman), older or even worse a child. I don't think anybody would prefer a beating over infelidity, whoever say that has deep emotional issues. Obviously SM games is a different ball game. Another form of cruelty is psychological violence, which if prolonged over a period of time can be as distressing (if not more) as the actual bodily harm. This form of violence often leads to violent reaction from the sufferer killing his/her tormentor.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 5:01 am on May 27, 2007
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