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ABC
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Greetings:
Q. DEFINE "WESTERN FEMALES"??
All this talk about "western" females confuses me. I don't think we are talking about apples to apples and oranges to oranges.
So, what do members mean when they say "Western" females??
Is this any female born or lives in the West??
Is this any females that acts like culturally from the West??
I get the feeling we are talking about non-asian females as "western" females. And if that is the case then in my opinion that is wrong.
Are ÝA.B.A.F's (American Born Asian Females) lumped into the "western" females??
Here's my take:
It is very hard to determine what is "westernize" and what is not, because it has nothing to do with geography as to do with beliefs. A person can be born in the U.S and brought up like they lived in Taiwan. In my mind, they are not an A.B. Like wise, a person could be born and live in Taiwan and be brought in like they lived in the U.S or "West" and might be considered a sudeo-A.B. It all has to do with environment and how they were raised.
With that being said, if we do want to generalize a little bit then ANY person that is brought in in the North America or Europe is considered A.B or American Born regardless of where they are born.
Ofcourse Ýliving in Asia does tend to mean that they will be brought up differently then if they did live in the North America or Europe due to what they are exposed to.
So, what is Hong Kong?? Asia or Western??
Q. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A FEMALE??
** I'm gonna generalize now!! **
I am one that has dated females that were ÝM.I.T's (Made in Taiwan), F.O.B's (Fresh of the Boat meaning Eastern culture), and A.B's (American Born). All have great qualities, but I'm most attracted to the A.B. females.
I don't want a female that thinks of me as the king of the castle and she's a subordient. ÝI want an equal partner. Someone that I can discuss/debate things with. I want her to be driven to reach her goals and not want to Ýjust stay at home and waste away. There is nothing wrong with staying at home mind you, but if she is does not have any type of goals, then we won't have much in common. And reaching her goals could be playing golf or cooking or working. But, having goals of her own is important.
We need to communicate, listen, compromise, and support each other. I don't think a relationship or even marriage is a one way street.
Yes. Looks are important. I won't lie about that. But all looks and no substance is just a play toy and not a female I'd take serious enough to think ahout a long term relationship with.
Am I dreaming?? Maybe.
Comments??
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 5:35 am on July 25, 2003
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ABC
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Smegma:
Quote: from Smegma on 7:32 am on July 26, 2003
What about me? Can I reply? 
I do disagree with you ABC. In regards to family values, I do think that Asians at large are more in line with people of Mediterranean descent -look at Latinamericans, and European countries on the Med. I think we look at the nothern Anglosaxons and Slavic peoples as being colder when it comes to family matters.
Yes you can reply!! ha ha ha!!
I agree about the family value part, but not the "wife needs to take care of the bread winner." Many instances it's the wife that works and/or makes more money then the male. I just think that that statement sounds very subordiant or subserviant for a lack of a better word.
I believe that family values is in a thread it's own, but I will still respond!! ha ha ha!! IMO: Asian family values goes both ways. The children listen to the parents/ elders and the it's the elders that will set standard.
Here's an example. My grandparents are from the "older traditional" culture. What they said was the law. Period. No discussions. If they did not like a female one of the grandchildren was dating, then she would have to go. The grandchild was forbidden to have any contact with that female or risk making the grandparents angry.
One last example:
A friend of mine dated a female that the parents disliked. He dated her for 2 years and during those two years to family disowned him. He did not exist. Not until he stopped seeing her and also appologized to the family.
You can say that these are extreme cases, but I assure you that it's more common then one would believe.
So ..... when people talk about asian culture you have to take it all and not be chosy. You can't have the female rooted in strong family values and then complain when she either listens exclusively to her parents or wants to always take care of them. It comes with the territory.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 5:48 am on July 25, 2003
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Arcadius
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ABC
I would define 'Western women' as women whose heads are full of the dominant cultural attitudes to be found in Europe, North America and other outposts of Western civilisation. The majority are Caucasians, of course, but this has nothing to do with race.
Obviously, there are many partly-Westernised people in the world today - both in Western countries and elsewhere. I think it's quite impossible to generalise about whether, say, a 2nd-generation Chinese-American girl is more Western than Asian. Wouldn't this depend entirely on her own particular background and circumstances?
As for what you're looking for in a woman - aren't you really asking what you're looking for in a wife or similar? Are there not other qualities you might look for in women that you could not reasonably expect in a wife, and might not even want in a wife?
To come down from the abstract - how many long-term relationships continue to offer much 'magic', romance or excitement to either party? Ý Ý Ý
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 6:02 am on July 25, 2003
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ABC
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Arcadius:
First off, thanks for answering my questions.
I think it's quite impossible to generalise about whether, say, a 2nd-generation Chinese-American girl is more Western than Asian. Wouldn't this depend entirely on her own particular background and circumstances?
I completely agree with your statement and that is why I think members are comparing apples and oranges in the "has thailand made you less tolerant of western woman? " thread. Thus the reason for this thread. So that myself and the other members can understand what is being discussed here.
To come down from the abstract - how many long-term relationships continue to offer much 'magic', romance or excitement to either party? Ý
Call me a weird, but the circle of friends I run 90% are happily married or are in a long term relationship with exactly what I decribed.
I've come close in past relationships, but was missing one component or another, which explains why I'm still looking!! ha ha ha!! But another reason why I'm not married yet. For me, dating is getting to know a female. Having her as my gf is an entirely different story. To me, gf means a possibly of something in the future. A possiblity, where I don't go in saying she's the only one, but if she isn't someone that I could possibly see a future with, then she will remain a just a friend.
Because I want to marry a female where trust, compassion, communication, hot SEX, compromise, support, ect. are found in the relationship. Yes, I understand that it takes work, but atleast it will be there.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 6:12 am on July 25, 2003
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Arcadius
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ABC
Because I want to marry a female where trust, compassion, communication, hot SEX, compromise, support, ect. are found in the relationship.
Well, I suppose that's just about what everyone wants. However, a marriage is a very long-term relationship and the sad fact is that time takes it's toll. One day, that gorgeous young thing you wedded will be 40. Long before then, in all probability, the hot sex will have cooled greatly through sheer familiarity. There won't be much passion or romance left in the relationship either. OK, these things may well have been replaced by other bonds which only time and/or children can produce, but you're still going to miss them - possibly quite badly.
It wasn't a frivolous point I was raising. Being married already, what I am currently looking for in women are the qualities which will make them good mistresses. Sex, charm, enchantment and all that sort of stuff. I do not need to care about their child-rearing abilities, common interests, steadfastness in a crisis and all that.
I think this causes at least as much confusion as Western v Asian when people are clearly comparing apples and oranges (eg, Western professional women v Thai BGs). This crops up most often in relation to questions of 'love' - where it often seems to be assumed that love must imply (or lead to) a monogamous relationship of some kind. I don't think it needs to imply or lead to that at all, although of course it may. In other words, it is possible to love a P4P girl to bits without having the tiniest intention of making the relationship permanent or institutionalising it in any way. Ý Ý
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 6:45 am on July 25, 2003
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silentbob1234
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Not again! I can see it now. This thread's gonna break down into the whole "why we like Asian women better than Western women" debate.
Haven't we got enough of those threads already??
BTW...Asian chicks rule!
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 7:25 am on July 25, 2003
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Hermanolobo
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In the bedroom = A whore
In the kitchen = a Chef
Otherwise my best friend
So say the French!
What they didn't say was how to find her !!!
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 7:39 am on July 25, 2003
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Hermanolobo
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Arcadius-
Married already !!???
"Thatd-le thatd-le chup chup chup !" so goes the Thai song.
Watch out for the carving knife when you are asleep if she finds out !
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 7:43 am on July 25, 2003
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X
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I hate making sweeping generalizations, and try to avoid them most of the time. ÝSince I doubt the generalization part of the q is aimed at someone like me, Iíll skip it.
Speaking on a totally personal levelÖ what kind of partner I want Ö I more or less agree with ABCís summation in his original post. Ý(I already have what I want, and I am grateful for that! ÝI do honestly think I am one of the few real ìlucky onesî). Ý I donít want or need looking after anymore than my partner needs someone to cook or clean for him. ÝI want and have independent financial security. ÝI do look up to my partner (as in respect him) but itís not any hero-worship type thingÖ I get the same back from him. ÝWe ARE equals. ÝWe both have freedom within the relationship. ÝAnd we both have mutual trust and respect of the other. ÝOf course it helps immensely that my partner has a mind set much the same as that of ABC. Ý
Itís a bit likeÖ. on paper ABC and I hold more or less the same values and expectations when it comes to what we look for in a potential partner. Ý Theoretically we could be a potential match. ÝOn the other hand DG and IÖ lol. ÝI am absolutely NOT what he looks for in a women, I am the antithesis of his ìperfect womanî, ÝI represent everything he hates, and vice versa. ÝMost likely the kind of woman DG falls forÖ would be the kind of woman whom ABC would scuttle away in horror from.
(sorry ABC & DG for using you pair as examples, I just find using examples easier to explain whatís on my mind ñ and obviously as weíre all ìblindî here, I also wasnít talking about looks either). Ý
I agree with Arcadius about the confusion we often see in here, comparing Western professional women v Thai BGs. ÝThatís just not a usable comparison. Ý
I should disagree with Arcadius on the points ofÖ the hot sex cools off in time, the passion and romance fade awayÖ butÖ I canít really disagree with that. ÝBecause too often thatís exactly why people get divorced ñ I hear this kinda thing just as often from women around me as from men. ÝIím not married, but have been in a committed relationship for the last 10 yrs almost. ÝI think in most instances (as the divorce rate shows) Arc IS right. ÝIn the minority of instances, where this isnít the case, where things actually improve with time, we wont generally hear about them on a forum like this.
I really do think that I am a very very lucky person, to have what I want, and to be content. ÝNo, itís more than contentÖ itís genuine happiness! ÝAnd I do think that only a very small percentage of long-term relationships fall into this category. (I hope that doesnít sound conceited and if doesÖ tough tittie!)
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 7:54 am on July 25, 2003
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