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Deleted Member
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Now I am not planning on moving for a year or so, and then it will take me a couple years to settle down, but eventually I am going to want to settle down and marry, well maybe. But from what i am hearing on this board in response to my original post is that no thai woman will ever truly love me, just my money. Is that true? I hope not.
assman
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 2:31 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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kmanrox
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i've never been, but i am sure that is an over-generalization...
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 2:42 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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chateaujade
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That's the overly cynical answer. Better to say that like all intercultural marriages, you would have a lot of obstacles to overcome, and if your significant other comes from the nightlife business, which is for many of us the path of least resistance, then you have added a lot more obstacles. Stacked the deck against yourself, in other words.
All that being said, and in earnest -- here I am with my wife, who I met in a bar at NEP, almost 15 years ago, and we are quite happy.
BUT I have seen a lot of guys go the same route and end up with the Wife from Hell (which, in case you don't know, is just down the pike from Nakhon Nowhere.)
Advice: go slow. And then slower. Test drive (live together.) Don't be a cheap charlie but don't fall too completely for the sick buffalo and momma needs an eye operation routine. If you can still stand each other after a year or two, that's a good sign. Beware of the green eyed monster (even when her eyes are brown.) Why get married jusy so you can run around on the 'old lady'? She will expect it and she has been trained to react vigorously, even violently. Being monogamous in Thailand isn't easy, and Thai wives are no dummies about this. In particular, ex bar girls: one aspect of this is that ALL of her old BG friends and acquaintances will rat you out as soon as you set foot anywhere in an entertainment district -- they WILL be on the phone to your wife. This is out of sheer spite. Believe me, I have seen it and I have had it happen to me!
Having children together is NOT a panacea for any of this, and may complicate things a lot.
If want you want is a MAID then by all means hire a maid, but hire the butt-ugliest double coyote you can find (but who is a great housekeeper/cook) and NEVER fall into the trap of getting domestic with HER, the most common major social faux pas a farang can make in this society!
Back in the land of the Big PX, the divorce rate is like 50%, so one ought not be too surprised that when you add the cross-cultural and other problems in, you are swimming against the current and there are lots of undertows, riptides etc.
Go slow. Don't get railroaded and don't get corralled. There are lots of girls out there 'digging for gold' and not all of them are prostitutes.
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 2:53 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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Ballsburstin
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ChateauJade,
Quick question for someone who has married a TG/BG and has some years under his belt: I've heard that visas for TGs (to the prim/proper USA) are easier to get if you marry a TG in the states (and then take her back home), than the other way around. I've also noticed that the tourist VISA has a question regarding "have you ever been a prostitute?" that they've added as part of an addendum just for Thailand. How did/do you deal with this issue? I would like someday to have my TG spend time with me in the States when I can't get to LOS. Needless to say, I have no intention of moving her here, married or not, no reason to make her as miserable as the rest of the America women here.
Dave
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 4:16 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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Kojak
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ChateauJade,
I heard that TG must clear all her Debt b4 she leave Thailand. Is that true ?
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 5:02 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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chateaujade
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I have no advice for you about visas. I live in Thailand and my wife has never been to the United States. I plan on spending the rest of my years in Thailand. While at some point in the future I would like to take my wife to meet what is left of my family, the reality is that US laws may make this impossible, or at least difficult.
Does this make me angry?
Bet your ass it does.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Beautiful Thai Girls
Posted on: 5:28 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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chateaujade
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kojak, I have never heard of such a law, and I am at a loss to see how it would be enforced. I'm skeptical.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 5:32 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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Ballsburstin
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ChateauJade,
Thanks for the feedback. BTW, for those interested, online versions of Tourist Visa for USA are on:
http://travel.state.gov/visaforms.html
Check out the second page -- it lists those things that are disqualifiers and require waivers. I know of an instance where a Mexican bargirl in Ensanda (Baja Mexico) was ratted on by her mother (!) when she tried to get to the U.S. to build a better life. The embassy refused the Visa, and she sits in Ensanada still doing bar girl work part-time. Ironic, 'cause her move to the States would have given her a "decent" job, by embassy standards. So the logic of the US immigration office is colored by hypocrits pretending to be morally righteous. Yet another reason why, like you ChateauJade, I will eventually end up spending my later years in Thailand.
I called the American Embassy in Thailand to get some more info on visas in general, and talked to a Thai gentleman there. He told me that for Tourist Visas, they look for reasons that the girl would not overstay her visa. These might include family, money in the bank, or other compelling ties to Thailand. A friend recently helped his TG apply for an educational visa -- on that one they require lots of cash in the bank, or a sponser in the U.S. who can show the monetary collateral in his/her bank account. (They ultimately stopped the process for some other reasons, but may do it next year). I haven't heard of specific dollar amounts that a TG needs in her bank account, nor that she must clear any debt. The embassy will, however, want to see her bank books, etc. So if she is a BG, she will be making siginficantly more than the average BKK girl, and this will be a red light for the process (in my opinion).
Just what I know so far. Maybe some of the other brothers have "been to the mountain?"
- Balls
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 7:19 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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MrJoe
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Two quick comments before I go back to work. More later (Sorry!)
1) All the advice you'll ever need intlass is in Chateau's first response. If you need confirmation from a similarly experienced bro, take mine. (18 yrs here, 10 yr successful relationship -= Do the math, there's a lesson there).
2) If you are a US citizen and you try to take a former BG to US, your experience in the US Embassy may very well change your whole attitude about being American. It did mine. (I'm not saying I'm sorry to be from US, I wouldn't change myu nationality for anything, but I am very bitter about the treatment I recieved from people whom I pay (taxes) to work for me. And I was "serving my country" at the time!!)
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 10:43 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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Deleted Member
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Be veryyyy careful about bringing a girl to the states, make sure you know them damn well before you do so. They can marry you, divorce you, take your $ and run!!!! have had it happen to 2 buddies of mine! Besides, even if they don't, you do not want a perfectly good sweet thai gal turning into an american bitch!!!! See ya, be smart, have fun and stay safe my friends!
assman
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 10:58 pm on Aug. 18, 2002
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