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chateaujade
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As Sandiegon will probably agree this is just one of hundreds or thousands of important bits of knowledge and skill that have to be understood to do what we do safely, sanely, and consensually.
And that is what professional Dommes get paid well for, to be able to do things safely, and skillfully, as well as with style, empathy, finesse.
Otherwise subs will get sliced, burned, abraded, choked, infected, permanently marked, or temporarily marked longer than their personal circumstances will allow -- a VERY important concern for men with significant others to return to.
BDSM is about trust and the exchange of power. The Domme assumes total responsibility for the welfare of the sub. That means skill and hard work. This is not play for a prostitute. This is play for professionals, and for dedicated lifestylers who are willing to commit themselves to learn.
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 6:17 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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sandiegon
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I agree with you 100% CJ. This is not a game to get laid or get off on some thing you have no idea what is all about.. BDMS is a lifestyle where you have respect/understanding. Question for CJ? is any of your dommes started out as subs? As a dom first thing I learned in this lifestyle is in order to become a good Dom/Domme you have to be sub so you know how your sub thinks and react based on what action you take as Dom... Here in San diego we offere workshops for the people who might be interested in this lifestyle or want a learn more. So fellows please if you curious about D/s or S&M learn and read first before start playing with it..
I can post few website where you can learn everything you want a know about this ...
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 6:39 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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chateaujade
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Thanks Sandiegon. Did I mention that I hereby retract every nastygram I ever posted about you? In fact if this love-fest prospers I will go delete them all.
Anyway the proposition that a novice must start as a sub and work their way up to being a Top is a very widely disseminated Scene cliche. My belief is that it works for some people but not others. For example I know a whole lot of male Doms who were never bottoms, and who swear they would never bottom, yet they have quite good Scene LTRs.
Personally I started out as a Dom and evolved into a sub as I got older.
Asian women, if you think about it, have been 'subs' all their lives, deprived of power and authority and reduced to either being breeders (and taught from childhood to suppress any accidental show of pleasure that they might feel despite the probably uncaring selfish technique of their husband) or prostitutes (also often not very expressive about pleasure, or unfamiliar with orgasm.) It;s like the old joke:
What's the difference between a Thai girl and jello?
Jello wiggles when you eat it.
Anyway, straight Thai women take to Topping like a duck to water. Given time and enough subs to practice on under the tutelege of a more experienced Domme, they learn well, or at least some do. Some are lazy, or flighty.
Our experience is that long time Dommes here evelve into switches, that is, they see their subs having a lot of fun while they, the Tops are doing all the work. So they start to get interested in bottoming.
However of our present 5 Dommes only one will switch in her professional sessions and that is Mistress Yuey.
Some of the others switch in their private lives.
Many many pro Dommes in USA and elsewhere, play on the bottom in their private lives. Its simple role reversal, "girls just want to have fun."
Overall, my observation has been that most, but not all, Scene people will change orientation at different times in their 'career' (lifestyle or pro), and some will be happy to play either role (true switches). Relatively few are 100% Dominant or 100% submissive.
BTW Sandiegon, one of my closest friends, known him for a quarter century, is the founder of Black Rose in the DC area, one of the largest and best known BDSM support groups around (now 15 years) not as old as TES but not shabby. His name is Jack McGeorge. Lifestyle het all the way. Old associate of Nancy Ava Miller (PEP). BR started about a year before I left for Thailand and Jack tried to drag me to meetings but I was never much of a joiner.
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 7:09 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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sandiegon
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Sure CJ I think our goal is the same... guide people who is interested in this lifestyle and inform them.. Personally I could be careless if person goes to Eden or any other establishment.. Yeah it may be true for some Toppers that they never started out as bottom or vice versa. With me I started out as Dom but I realiaze I need to learn what sub thinks before I can top them...
Thanks to Mistress Brea .... Here we have to two active clubs.. ClubX and SDPlay and we are growing every week. I have participated in may other bdsm clubs but now I tend to play with very selective subs.. by the way why don't you hire few subs for your establishment... so I can visit.. I do have a number of couple of good slaves who lives in BKK.. I had a session with one and it was worth while....
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 7:25 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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chateaujade
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BTW Sandie I don't consider myself to be any sort of expert. My 35 Scene years maybe qualify me as a journeyman. NLA and the Old Guard crowd would doubtless titter behind their hands if I claimed anything more.
My personal views are just that, they aren't dogma. There are many flavors of the Scene and quite a few groups that try to be didactic about things. The Goreans come to mind, I've always regarded them as the SM answer to the Trekkies. But, to each his own...
(Damn I hope you are NOT a Gorean.)
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 7:30 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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chateaujade
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Forgive me if I ever posted about this before, I may have but can't recall, anyway to answer Sandiegon's question:
When I was organizing this place, I figured that we needed Dommes and subs in roughly equal proportions. But I was wrong. It became clear very fast once we started taking bookings that almost nobody wanted subs, maybe 1 out of 20 or 30 inquiries, and of those 90% sounded clueless. Now, I wasn't going to put a pro sub in with a clueless wannabe Top, that's a disaster.
So by the time I weeded out the pretenders, what was left was like 1 out of 200-300 inquiries, and even fewer that turned into actual sessions.
We DO have one switch as I mentioned. She plays on the bottom very nicely. Not too heavy, and not completely trained -- again for lack of demand. But the few guys who want to have a middle session, that's for her, and Doms that we know and trust no problem. But we don't say much about this on the website, as the demographic is so strongly male subs looking for Dommes, I think it does nothing for the Dommes' image if the subs know they switch.
I think that is where Mistress Gaow went wrong, for example, as her site was schizo, she called herself Mistress and then went straight into talking about sucking cock bareback, taking it in the ass, etc. I am absolutely sure that she turned off a lot of subs with that...she would have been better off promoting herself as a pro sub or a switch who was mostly sub, that would have been OK. (But then she would have been well advised to set up a studio, and arrange for some security, rather than doing outcall -- lest she become eel food in some klong courtesy of some serial killer type. Remember the bastard in the midwest somewhere who was killing female subs after recruiting them on the Internet? I mean, it does happen, and is the bane of a fem sub's life if she isn't settled into a LTR.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 7:45 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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chateaujade
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NOT a Trekkie. Male Trekkies have no dicks. (Female Trekkies have mustaches.) Anyway he would have already said "Live long and prosper" at least once if he were a Trekkie.
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 7:48 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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Chompoo
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I don't know what happened to Mistress Gaow, but I think there was a very good market niche for her services. While most serious members of the scene would laugh at her approach, there are many men who want exactly what I think she provided.
They want, IMO, the domineering girl in leather (or rubber) with whips and chains who will play act in tying them up. But they also want to get their dicks sucked and to f_ck her as part of the package (probably mixing the fantasies together along the lines of "Don't come in my mouth until I tell you to!" or "f_ck me in the ass, slave!"  ). They don't really want the feeling of helplessness or submission or whatever it is that you provide. These guys are totally clueless about your scene, but they get their own fantasy as confused as it is.
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 7:58 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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chateaujade
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BTW Mistress Christy is indeed, as BK pointed out a while back, offering 'slavegirls' of two grades (details on request) at 3000 baht to 10,000 baht for 2 hours.
I will have to ask her what the details are, I could speculate but it's better to ask.
The good thing about her short sessions is that as they are short, if the thing is going to fizzle (personal chemistry) then the loss is small.
I KNOW Christy is a great Domme, she is truly scary when she gets going. But I don't know her female subs.
I am very proud of Christy, my second best protege ever (under another name, one of the original 4 Dommes at CJ). The only one better is her close friend Mistress Virginia, a virtuosa, a Diva, and whom I am grooming to take over the management of the House next year. (Out of the Kingdom till after Xmas.)
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 8:02 pm on Oct. 1, 2002
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