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Ballsburstin
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CG,
Some remarkably good advice there, have to agree on all points, and hope Harry takes it to heart and ends up a happier man for it.
You bring up some good points that are worth expounding. My TGF still gets the occasional email from former customers/boyfriends. They fall into one of two categories: guys that really loved her (like Harry), and those who are just trying to play her. They all know her current situation with me. She shows me some of these emails.
She also asks me for advice about what to do. I always tell her, that in the end, she has to decide who she wants to be with and why. For the ones that are playing her, I explain why I think they act that way. My advice to her about this type of punter: tell them to f_ck off.
For the ones that really loved her, I explain that too. Because most punters I've met are jai dee and treat the ladies fairly well. For those, I tell her to explain the situation to them, and if they are not just pulling her chain, she will get an honest reply. She usually does, and it's of the form, "you are a fine lady, your b/f is a lucky man, and I hope you will be very happy together." She has left a string of broken hearts behind, and it's a little tough on her, too.
Mostly, though, these kinds of emails are just minor distractions and annoyances. Mainly because she really doesn't want to hurt people's feelings (I didn't believe this at first, figured she was blowing smoke up my arse, but after 2.5 years it's consistently true) and she's not sure how to let them go. Part of her leaving the scene is growing up enough to place her interests first. So I guess, in a way, the heartstruck emails she gets are not only a challenge to our relationship, but a growing up experience for her too. She was fairly rudderless when I met her, though her agenda was to meet a farang, get married, and live happily ever after. It's taken her awhile to learn how to steer her ship.
- Balls
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 1:57 pm on June 23, 2004
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ThaidUp
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Quote from CG "My original post in this thread was that making the girls promises, telling them they are the only one, profess undying love, making them think you are there for them emotionally, etc. is how they get hardened. I stand by this position.
ThaidUp, I remember you saying something similar in a thread about a week ago, right?"
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Correct, this sequnce can only happen so many times before it will be very difficult to break through the armour a TG will be around her heart to protect herself. next usually becomes alcohol and drugs to relieve the pain and then you have a basket case.
Harry, I think the main problem that the Welchman will have against him is his anger problem. TG's really hate people who lose their temper easy. It may be the deal breaker.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 10:33 pm on June 23, 2004
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HarryParatestes
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Quote: from ThaidUp on 10:33 am on June 24, 2004
Quote from CG "My original post in this thread was that making the girls promises, telling them they are the only one, profess undying love, making them think you are there for them emotionally, etc. is how they get hardened. I stand by this position.
ThaidUp, I remember you saying something similar in a thread about a week ago, right?"
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Correct, this sequnce can only happen so many times before it will be very difficult to break through the armour a TG will be around her heart to protect herself. next usually becomes alcohol and drugs to relieve the pain and then you have a basket case.
Harry, I think the main problem that the Welchman will have against him is his anger problem. TG's really hate people who lose their temper easy. It may be the deal breaker.
ThaidUp, I think I've broken thru the armor - our last few emails have been pretty intense (hey ABC, I got another one to chew on!) - and all the cards are pretty much on the table.
She met the Welcher over New Year's, about 4 months before she and I met, and apparently he offered to bring her back to jolly old on a visa at that time. Being just a poor girl from a poor family (apologies to Freddy Mercury, may he RIP) I guess it sounded like a great offer and she took him up on it. I mean why not, when you make your living going to bed with guys you aren't necessarily attracted to, why not agree to go to England for a month with a gnomish Welshman and see if the streets are really paved in gold? Sounds better than trolling for tricks in Bangkok, doesn't it?
Now she is between a rock and a hard place, because I proposed to be there just at the exact time when the Welch will be squiring her off across the pond. She would much rather be with me than him but England is already a done deal, a bird in the hand for her.
The question becomes am I willing to wait for her to return sometime mid-September, as she has promised to call and/or email me twice a week from England, she has promised me she won't marry him, and she has promised me she won't let him get her pregnant.
How much torture can I possibly stand, you may ask? Stay tuned for the next installment....
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 12:09 pm on June 24, 2004
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canomad
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harry,
I think it is univeral rule for BG "take the bird in the hand" I know of far more BG that have gotten burned by punters than punters by BG.
I am starting to think that every BG that has worked more than 3 weeks has had a punter that told her he loves her, wants to marry her,tells her to quit working and he will support her. Gives her 10,000 or 20,000 Baht. Punter leaves for Home, promises he will get her a Visa, etc etc. He gets home and starts thinking. I am Marrying a hooker. Punters goes sideways, starts accusing her of cheating stops calling, then the girl goes back to bar. I see this happen like a broken record. In like 6 out of 10 cases the girls has quit the bar and isn't servicing customers but the punters still go crazy.
(in the other 4, the girls are working every dick they can find. I have a friend that is married to a supposed non-BG. 30 minutes after his plane leaves for the states she is down working the bar looking for customers. And we can't tell him he won't listen)
So given trhe crazy western attitudes of punters I am surprised that ant BG belives anything a westerner tells her. Believe it when she sees it.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 1:54 pm on June 24, 2004
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Dieter
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i know from my own how you are all feel have same experiences as you all!! only with a Tlb!!
my story comes later...but many Thais like to play a game with us farangs!!
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 2:01 pm on June 24, 2004
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issanking
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man are you tottally deranged ? she's playing an each way bet if it don't work out with the welsh man she's back with you, anyway nothing wrong with short fat welsh builder's, now all the mines are closed. One point I need to raise " she never asked me for money" but I gave to her anyway, they know there going to get money HELLO your a farrang, this goes back to the days when to travel you really needed a lot of money and consider the distance. most girls will say up to you because most guys know the going rate the newbies always pay according to local rate back home.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Beautiful Thai Girls
Posted on: 8:32 pm on June 24, 2004
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candy sweet
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Some very good advice boys, and heartbreak is a hard thing to endure. Chin up, theres lots of little fishies in that sea. LOL
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 9:38 pm on June 24, 2004
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Moxnix48
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In the end most TG's will go for the best deal, regardless of how they may actually feel. I am in that situation now. I thought I had a solid lock on a freelancer, University student. I know she prefers me, but she met an younger ex-pat guy that lives there. He is there and is offering more up front, so he wins. I have learned my lesson in the past and won't sponsor any more Thai girls until I make the move there. She knows I won't sponser her, so as she says even though she wants to be with me more, she has to think of what provides for her best. I have to give her credit because she told me upfront before I got there. And she knows that I was going to lay some heavy cash on her while there. I just wonder if the new guy really knows just how expensive she is going to be.
So I land in Bkk tonight with a broken heart, but it will only take about 5 minutes to start hunting again.
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 9:42 pm on June 24, 2004
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dirty guru
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Thats the spirit! I can tell you alot of us have been burnt so many times, you turn hair trigger and burn at the first hint of behaviour that indicates that they are about to try it on. I suggest that you guard that easily led heart. Exact affection, take those moments, but deal with the reality that most of it is bullsh_t. Until you toughen up, keep it as a hobbie. Dont allow one to get under your skin. Within 5 years this advice will be very old hat to you. And by then you should have ventured into the fires alot more, stronger, and enlightened! Maybe even happy with one.
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 9:50 pm on June 24, 2004
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ThaidUp
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Quote from Moxnix48 "I just wonder if the new guy really knows just how expensive she is going to be. "
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Oh no that guy could be me? Yes I am well aware. Cell phone shopping today. Maybe I will answer the SMS's you send? You can have her back after she graduates. She will be all educated and experienced.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 9:53 pm on June 24, 2004
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