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atl
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we have this on the Z but I wanted to start here:
A married man, alone, boards a train to discover he is sharing a cabin with a married woman also traveling alone.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold.'
'I have a better idea,' she replied 'Just for tonight, why dont we pretend that we're married?'
'Wow! That's a great idea!', he exclaimed.
'Good,' she replied 'Get your own f***ing blanket!!!'
So, after a moment of silence, he rips a nasty fart!
atl
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 11:53 pm on Aug. 10, 2009
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atl
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Shreddy Wheat told this one...and I wanted to bring it over:
No matter what this husband did in bed, his wife never achieved an orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to consult their Rabbi.
The Rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the following suggestion : 'Hire a strapping young man. While the two of you are making love, have the young man wave a towel over you. That will help your wife fantasize and should bring on an orgasm.'
They go home and follow the Rabbi's advice. They hire a handsome young man and he waves a towel over them as they make love. It does not help and the wife is still unsatisfied. Perplexed, they go back to the Rabbi.
'Okay,' he says to the husband, 'Try it reversed. Have the young man make love to your wife and you wave the towel over them.'
Once again, they follow the Rabbi's advice They go home and hire, the same strapping young man. The young man gets into bed with the wife and the husband waves the towel. The young man gets to work with great enthusiasm and soon she has an enormous, room-shaking, ear-splitting screaming orgasm.
The husband smiles, looks at the young man and says to him triumphantly, 'See that, you schmuck? THAT'S how you wave a towel!!'*
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 11:56 pm on Aug. 10, 2009
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james bond
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A blonde went into a world wide message centre to send a message to her mother overseas. When the man told her it would cost $300, she exclaimed, "I don't have any money, but I would do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother!" The man arched an eyebrow, "Anything?" "Yes, anything," the blonde promised. With that, the man said, "Follow me." He walked into the next room and ordered, "Come in and close the door." She did. He then said, "Get on your knees." She did. He then said, "Take down my zipper." She did. He then said, "Go ahead... take it out." She took it out, grabbed hold with both hands... then paused. The man closed his eyes, and whispered, "Well...go ahead!" The blonde slowly brought her mouth closer to it, and while holding it close to her lips, tentatively said, "Hello, Mom?!"
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 6:56 pm on Aug. 11, 2009
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expatchuck
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Body Found In Salt River
Champaign County Sheriffs Department reports finding a man's body in the Salt Fork river just west of the Kelly's Tavern Historical Site Bridge.
The man's name will not be released until his family has been notified. The victim apparently drowned after consuming an excessive amount of alcohol.
He was wearing black fishnet stockings, a red garter belt with matching bra, and an Obama T-shirt.
The deputy removed the Obama T-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 8:36 pm on Aug. 11, 2009
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atl
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JB,
that is f***ing, far and away, the best blond joke I have ever heard!!!!!! cheers 
That is going out to my email book!
and EPC, shall I pay for your flight to the states so you can join in with all the other old white people bitching about Obama? seriously you must really feel left out 9000 miles away 
Kidding,
atl
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 9:49 pm on Aug. 11, 2009
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expatchuck
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Yeah, all us old white people might also be more concerned about what this guy is ramming down our throats than all you young white guys that have had everything handed down to you by us old white folks.
Give that some thought.
PS: Don't send the ticket. Just forward money via paypal.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Beautiful Thai Girls
Posted on: 11:55 pm on Aug. 11, 2009
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atl
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LOL!
I aplogize for my digression and that little jab...lets keep this one on the jokes 
atl
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 8:34 am on Aug. 12, 2009
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Kaymanx
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A man decides to buy a new scope for his rifle. He goes to a shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope. The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, "Look, this here scope is so good, you can see my house all the way up on that there hill."
The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing.
"What's so funny?" asks the clerk.
"I see a nekkid man and a nekkid woman running around in that there house," the man replies.
The clerk grabs the scope from the man, looks at his house, then hands two bullets to the man and says, "Here are two bullets, my friend. I'll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife's head off and shoot the guy's dick off."
The man takes another look through the scope and says, "You know what? I think I can do that with one shot!"
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 4:04 am on Aug. 13, 2009
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james bond
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THE DRINKER An englishman was drinking at the pub all night. The bartender came up to him and told him that the bar was closing. So the englishman stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. He tried to stand up one more time with the same result. So he figure he'd just crawl outside, hang out for a while, get some fresh air and hopefully that would sober him up.Once outside he stood up and fell again-right on his face. So he decided to crawl the 4 blocks to his home and when he arrived at the door he tried one more time with the same results. Exhausted, he then gave up and started crawling to the bedroom. When he reached his bed he tried one more time to stand up. This time he managed to pull himself upright but he quickly fell right into the bed and fell sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. The next morning, he woke up with his wife standing over him shouting at him. "So, you've been out drinking again!!" "What makes you say that?" He asked as he put on an innocent look. "The pub called! You left your wheelchair there again."
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 5:44 am on Aug. 13, 2009
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atl
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JB,
I have gotten a ton of milage off your blond joke...probably the best one I have heard in a few years...
but this is a quick one-liner that may come in handy:
what is the difference between acne and a catholic priest?
Acne usually comes on a boys face after he turns 12!
atl
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 11:28 pm on Aug. 13, 2009
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