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snpark
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maybe they will relaunch steve jobs as steve jobs 3g, even faster etc etc
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Bangkok Women : Meet Sensual Bangkok Women
Posted on: 5:56 am on Jan. 17, 2009
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Mr Alan
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Quote: from jingjo on 3:48 am on Jan. 17, 2009
Daffy has suffered a margin call
Well, I don't really know, but one can only dream...
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Thai Girls : Meet Sexy Thai Girls
Posted on: 10:08 am on Jan. 17, 2009
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CalEden
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Rumour is Job's is in negotiations with one of the worlds leading Cryogenic Freezing Companies. These negotiations involved proposed liver surgery dates and contingency planning. The firm dispatched a team of engineers to Apple's headquarters in Cupertino to survey the site for the proposed Cryogenic Chamber. It has been reported that the basement beneath Apple co-founder current office is a prime site for the Cryogenic Chamber.
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Sexy Bangkok Girls
Posted on: 11:12 am on Jan. 17, 2009
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DaffyDuck
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Quote: from jingjo on 3:48 pm on Jan. 17, 2009
Daffy has suffered a margin call
Do you even know what that is?
Yep, that's what I thought....
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 12:50 am on Jan. 18, 2009
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DaffyDuck
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I see it as boring and pointless to comment on people gloating over the hopes that someone will die -- it really only shows what low-class hacks you guys are.
As for the articles and rumors -- maybe it would behoove you all to learn how to read -- particularly the Bloomberg article. It's not even speculation anymore, now they are just making stuff up.
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Bangkok Women : Meet Beautiful Thai Girls
Posted on: 12:54 am on Jan. 18, 2009
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DaffyDuck
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Now, you too can do it : Write Your Own Steve Jobs Story!
It’s easy to get plenty of media attention by writing your own speculative story about the health of Apple’s CEO. Just follow these simple steps.
Imagine some horrible or painful medical condition, preferably one with a reasonably high mortality rate. If your imagination fails you, pick an organ and say that it’s failing.
Call up a doctor or two and ask them if, given the publicly available information about Steve Jobs’s health, they could categorically rule out the condition you have imagined.
If even one of them cannot, you have your story. If one cannot but others do, you have your story as “Some doctors say this, but others disagree.”
Be sure, in your story, to conflate “Apple Inc.” with “Steve Jobs,” deliberately ignoring that federal and state privacy laws prevent Apple from disclosing medical information on any employee (including its CEO) without that employee’s permission. The more you spread the blame around, the harder it is for people to see through your story.
Also, since the media has invested heavily in the fiction that Steve Jobs runs everything at Apple (because it sells copies of stories, which sells ads), be sure to emphasize that, too.
Profit!
If you still find it too difficult to follow these simple instructions, here's some help for you - Just use this handy-dandy Steve Jobs Health Story Template® and fill in the blanks as needed!
Apple CEO Steve Jobs May Have ______
Doctors familiar with medicine say that Apple CEO Steve Jobs, who began a six-month medical leave of absence this week, may be suffering from ______.
If true, the condition is far more serious than Apple has previously let on. It could sideline the “World’s Most Important” CEO for longer than he has indicated, or keep him from returning to the Apple helm at all.
Jobs was treated for pancreatic cancer in 2004, and told investors that he had made a full recovery. Nonetheless, his public appearances during 2008 made it clear Jobs was rapidly losing weight, spurring fears that his cancer had returned.
A letter Apple released on January 5 said that Jobs was suffering from a “hormone imbalance. Eight days later, the CEO said his problems were “more complex” and that he would leave the company until June to have them treated, sparking more speculation that Jobs is fatally ill.
”Given his history with pancreatic cancer, it’s impossible to rule out ______,” said Dr. ____, [insert doctor’s title here]. “Cancer can have side effects throughout the body, including in the ______ system. The information he’s provided is just too vague. Only his doctors know for sure.”
The painful surgery Jobs reportedly underwent in 2004 could also have side effects, according to Dr. ______, [insert second doctor’s title here]. “While these procedures are generally safe and well-understood, there’s always the possibility that the body will eventually have problems with such a radical change to the system. If he’s not producing the right hormones [or “enzymes” or “proteins”], it could put stress on the ______ and eventually lead to weight loss and, if not corrected, death.”
While Apple has a deep bench of talent to run the company in his absence, investors and analysts alike speculate that without Jobs at the helm, the company will [eventually/rapidly] decline into the same moribund state it was in before Jobs returned to the CEO’s seat in 1997. Under his watch, Apple released mega-hit products like the iMac, the iPod, and the iPhone, all of which Jobs personally invented while refusing to take credit.
”His long-term absence puts the company’s future in jeopardy,” said ______, an analyst for [insert name of analyst’s Wall Street firm]. “Apple’s in a great position now, and Steve will be involved in major decisions while on medical leave, but if he stays gone longer than six months, or doesn’t come back at all, it’s possible that Apple will again fade into irrelevance. The company really needs a leader that the media can fixate on, because they’ve proven they won’t pay attention to the products without a personality behind them.” [You might have to cut that last sentence for “space” reasons, being a media person yourself who knows that sometimes good quotes have to be cut.]
Jobs, an unnecessarily private man, refused to comment for this story or to release full medical records at our request.
If you can’t even get doctors or analysts to return your calls, or to play along with your speculation, don’t worry! Just say that “some doctors” and “some analysts” speculate these things. If worse comes to worst, just punt and use the passive voice: “There has been speculation that Jobs is suffering from ______ and may not return to Apple.”
Easy peasy!
See? Just follow these simple rules, as so many huge media writers and outlets already have. Once you know the secrets, the article just writes itself!
So what are you waiting for? Go cash in on the biggest media fad of the new year!
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 12:58 am on Jan. 18, 2009
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CalEden
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DD, then this hysteria and speculation presents a buying opportunity for the investor that feels Apples future prospects are promising and the Apple creative genius CEO Steve Jobs has been forthright about his health matters. Apples track record under other CEO's has been disappointing.
Perhaps if Jobs had allowed Steven Wozniak to return to Apple there would have been an palatable transition.
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Thai Girls : Meet Active Thai Girls
Posted on: 1:49 am on Jan. 18, 2009
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Buttman 007
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Personally, I wish Jobs well. He truly is a creative and innovative genius.
But I do find fault with Apple being elusive and misleading about his health. One's health is a private matter, but not when you're the CEO of a publically-traded company.
Last summer, Apple stated that Jobs looked gaunt because of an ordinary bacteria infection in his stomach; he took some medication and was supposedly fine.
Obviously, that was a bullshit story.
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Thai Women : Meet Matured Thai Women
Posted on: 2:04 am on Jan. 18, 2009
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snpark
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so daffy are you remortgaging your bungalow and buy buy buy another apple share?
as this is obviously all just bullsh1t right, steve jobs isnt going to die, and his new invention will be out next year and your share (or now 2 shares) will be $5,000,000 each
right??
or are you just deflecting the truth again?
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Bangkok Girls : Meet Attractive Thai Girls
Posted on: 3:38 am on Jan. 18, 2009
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